Monday 1 August 2011

Confessions


if we are plain friends      
how come your lips taste like sweet
wine and cinnamon ?




i could not resist
show you my true intentions   
i  lied, i do care   
 


Taken aback by his admission, she chides him,
"What was all that talk about - I am busy, let's just be friends only - then?

Embracing her, he murmurs against her soft lips,
"I like confusing you."



Updated Author's Note:    I have revised this post to fit the theme of Friday Romantic Challenge: Confusion.  The first part is the original poetry (haiku) form to give you the backgrounder of the story. 

The second part is in fiction form, a short one so I don't overstretch myself.   FCA is fine as I am trying to improve writing in fiction form.   

Original notes:  In haiku form (3 lines, 5-7-5 syllables), the theme for Haiku Heights is Confession. 

After almost 4 months into blogging, I feel I have grown so much from joining communities and reading a lot of writing / blogs.  Free verse is still my favourite form, but haiku is growing on me.   Thanks for your kind words and visit ~  

Picture credit:  unthinkablethoughts.tumblr 

44 comments:

  1. nicely played, funny how some say one thing and mean another, if only all the bs would just go away.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ah, sweet wine and cinommon...perfection :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. very sensual.

    cinammon is a fave of mine :-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. nice...love the contraction in the second part...oh how easy it is to mince words once that heat begins between friends...

    ReplyDelete
  5. …both Haikus are wrapped with strong emotions enough to silent a mockingbird... wine and cinnamon raised the first one in its full essence.. while the second one is set in lower deep tone.. very well done!(:

    ~kelvin

    ReplyDelete
  6. mmm lovely.


    http://bttrflyscar.blogspot.com/2011/07/confession.html

    ReplyDelete
  7. Thanks so much for your lovely words...*hugs*

    I see that my total page views hit 11,111 ~ cool! Thanks for the visit.

    ReplyDelete
  8. confessing to love...
    sensuous!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Some of the most common yet complicated relationships are based on these moments.

    How utterly tantalising!

    ReplyDelete
  10. wine and cinnamon -- hmmm! *licking lips*

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well, some friendships certainly do blossom into the sweetest of temptations...sounds like a deliciously sensuous coming together, too.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Beautiful....and it rings true in my life, too. Thank you for this. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  13. Awesome writings!
    Heaven, you are trying so many different styles of writing and doing so well!
    Bravo!

    Margie :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Haiku and love, they seemed to be so compatible. Your offerings make my memories go back to years ago, those tender moments shared, whispering sweet nothings!

    ReplyDelete
  15. You are always such a joy to read.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Not to mention your prowess at writing Flash 55's

    ReplyDelete
  17. this poem is beautiful! and I love the photos you display on your blog! :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. beautiful honest self-exploratory write...

    ReplyDelete
  19. 'I lied, I do care' - says it all about the convolutions of romance.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Wow steamy what a great read !

    ReplyDelete
  21. wow.. I love it.. heavenly..

    Someone is Special

    ReplyDelete
  22. Well written, enjoyed the word play.

    ReplyDelete
  23. My, so full of romance. A joy to read!!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Wine and cinnamon :)Lovely read.

    ReplyDelete
  25. i wish i could write like this.

    ReplyDelete
  26. nicely written, brought a smile to my place. i can relate ;)

    ReplyDelete
  27. terrific and sensuous :) great read..

    ReplyDelete
  28. A great read.
    Love the connection between the photo and the poetry.

    ReplyDelete
  29. This is a delicious confession--and confection!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Mmmmm - what a delicious confession!

    ReplyDelete
  31. sensuous, romantic and somewhat tasty confession, Heaven :) glad that haiku is growing on you :D

    ReplyDelete
  32. Hello.
    I am in the land of the unknown when it comes to all these poetry forms.
    I do like the opening lines though. I think we've all said one thing and meant something else at some point in time.
    I like the underlying sensual tone too. The image is perfect for the piece.

    Nicely done, Heaven!

    ReplyDelete
  33. Hey Heaven, sensuous seems to be the word. Clever how you manipulated this to fit the theme. Tasty lips. hmm...

    Denise

    ReplyDelete
  34. Hi,

    Love the coyness of saying one thing whilst another coquettish in mind. Both examples beautiful in own right!

    I adore Cinnamon biscuits/cakes, and sprinkled on custard let alone added to curried dishes! ;)

    best
    F

    ReplyDelete
  35. Hi,
    Yes, this is a very sensuous text! I am no expert on poetry, but I really like your haiku. (Great that you could combine several memes here!) You say so much with so few words.
    Fits the theme "Confused", perfectly.
    I agree with Jabblog's comment, the line 'I lied, I do care' says so much.

    Best wishes,
    Anna
    Anna's RFW No 14 - "Confused"

    ReplyDelete
  36. That all linked rather nicely! I enjoy both haiku and flash, so it was nice to see this combo, one playing off of the other. Nice!

    ReplyDelete
  37. Piercing lines. .from beginning to end. Beautifully done.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Poetry and poetic prose so beautifully melded. My favorite bit: "i lied, i do care"

    ReplyDelete
  39. Heaven,

    It's great that you convey so much in so few words. Wish I had that talent.

    Embracing her close, he murmurs against her soft lips, - In terms of the line above, I was thinking that if it doesn't mess with your poetry flow (about which I know absolutely nothing) you could leave out 'close', since embracing her would be drawing her close. Hope this helps and that I haven't confused you.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Thank you for the feedback.

    JL Campbell, I have edited it.

    I appreciate all your inputs.

    ReplyDelete
  41. I see the appeal, though I sometimes find guys who do that kind of thing annoying--it tests my patience and my sense of being true to yourself. Nice work ~ MsQ

    ReplyDelete
  42. I've added a postscript to my post.
    Visiting is optional.
    Best wishes,
    Anna
    Anna's RFW No 14 - "Confused"

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for your visit and comments ~ I appreciate them ~