Thursday, 1 September 2011

Breath of Summer

House is quiet
Standing still, ghostly pale
Like no one lives there

Bed is tidy
Pillows, cushions stiffed-neck
No one ruffling it today

Floor is clean
Polished like a mirror
Looking at itself

Suddenly, luggage heaving
Doors opening wide
Running feet, gleeful sounds

Windows flinging sideways
Bright sunflowers in pockets
Last breath of summer
    


Author's Note:   Flash Fiction Friday - Tell a story in 55 words.  G-man, here's one! 


I can feel the cool air nipping, don't you?  
My pre-teen daughter arrived yesterday after spending the month with her cousins in Vancouver for vacation.  Her school starts next week, Tuesday after our long weekend.  She is like a breeze of summer with her endless chatter. ;-)

38 comments:

  1. = )-- I love sunflowers in pockets, Heaven.

    I bet it was so good to see your daughter after a month! Enjoy the holiday.

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  2. Sounds more like a fun truth than fiction. Awesome write.

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  3. Yeah lots of truth here, everything can seem empty and then home and sounds abound as the luggage hits the floor.

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  4. Yes, last breath of summer. I love it. I think my poem conveyed simillar thoughts. When I see sunflowers, I reallize summer is 'toast.'lin

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  5. you've told a lovely story my friend :)

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  6. For years we spent a week at Newport Beach with our kids and friends each summer. This brought it all back. Thank you for that!

    http://www.kimnelsonwrites.com/2011/09/01/seek-the-son/

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  7. Excellent transition from quiet to suddenly joyful entrance and return of people back from their vacation. :)

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  8. Heaven...
    Perfectly stated.
    But I gotta tell ya, I LOVE Autumn!
    Loved your 55.
    Thanks for playing, Thank you for your wonderful support, and have a Kick Ass Week-End

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  9. aahh, this was like a breath of fresh air~ Say goodbye to summer camp and head back to reality! I loved it~

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  10. I loved this. You captured the fleeting end-of-summer......

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  11. This was lovely. There's nothing sweeter than an empty space being filled up with love.

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  12. Isn't it wonderful when family comes home? Though, frankly, I disparage of ever achieving a clean house, even for a minute.

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  13. Lovely. I like how you build up from one state to the other. I don't think I could ever survive a month away from my kids but I can imagine what a fluster the homecoming would be like. Well done.

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  14. Sounds like the end of the holiday...

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  15. Sweet Piece Heaven... Put a smile on my face...

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  16. Well mirrored thoughts and ideas!! I can clearly see the great imagery too!! :)

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  17. You create a real sense of anticipation and then fulfilment and a new beginning in this. End of summer, but also beginning of a new time.

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  18. This is absolutely beautiful. And do you know that this stanza is perfect?
    Floor is clean
    Polished like a mirror
    Looking at itself

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  19. Nah, don't bbelieve it, summer's not finished with us yet. Great poem - just a tad premature! Or is that just my optimism, again?

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  20. A beautiful poem Heaven.
    My favourite part is:
    'Floor is clean
    Polished like a mirror
    Looking at itself
    A wonderful haiku all by itself.

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  21. Romantically beautiful..
    Summers fading away to fall.. best part of the year!

    hugs xo

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  22. Awwww Lovely, especially the happiness at the end :)

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  23. Just beautiful. Love the joyful ending.

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  24. I love the imagery about the floor reflecting itself. Loved it.

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  25. hotspicywings@yahoo.com2 September 2011 at 10:21

    awesome!
    welcome home, beautiful girl!

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  26. This is lovely!

    And, I know what you mean about that endless chatter!

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  27. Reading it right through gave a good feeling... yes, I felt Happy.. and joyous..

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  28. Ahhh, I remmeber clean floors and tidier things.

    You must be so gald to have her back.

    Not too much cooler here yet, but soon I hope. Let me check my iPhone...

    Wow, next week we could get down to highs of aabout 32 C. Yay! Bring it on.

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  29. Ohhh! That's so nice. I'm sure she's glad to be back, just as you're glad to have her back. ;-)

    Love the sunflowers, too. One of my favorite flowers.

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  30. Breath of summer....so true....love how you captured this one! :-)

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  31. i like who you have movement to this, with the quiet house to begin with and rushing energy at the end. sunflowers in pockets says something of the characters involved, and i like it:) my kind of people.

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  32. I loved it...Its almost like the house was filled with a new regenerating energy :) :)

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  33. Enjoying the calm and cleanliness... AND then the love and laughter arrive. I'll take that any day! :)

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  34. Beautiful photo and a wonderfully evocative poem to go with it. I'd like to be in that house... :)

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