Friday, 29 July 2011

Content


fingers amble to  
gently caress my flushed cheek
for moment, time stilled      







shoulders burrow deep
listening to shallow breaths
heart content, i sleep


 


Author's Note:   This is a senryu (a haiku form) because the subject is emotions or life; outside of nature.  While writing with a form restricts my thoughts, it is a challenge to find the right words to make it tight and meaningful (17 syllables).  The haiku form is growing on me; it is much easier than the Royal Rhyme Form.

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13 comments:

  1. Anonymous30 July 2011 at 07:38

    you can hardly tell you struggled.

    love it!

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  2. Brian Miller30 July 2011 at 07:44

    nice....love a good snuggles...your verse feels good to me...and i could not agree more on following the verse in your heart...

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  3. Anonymous30 July 2011 at 08:31

    perfection! :)

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  4. Scarlet30 July 2011 at 08:49

    Thanks Lisa and David ~

    Brian, I hear you. Thanks for the visit. I will be checking in with D'Verse later to see what is our prompt/challenge.

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  5. Anonymous30 July 2011 at 10:29

    I love the Haiku! Beautiful!

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  6. Anonymous30 July 2011 at 11:02

    My fave line:
    "for moment, time stilled"

    ;-)

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  7. Rachel Hoyt30 July 2011 at 11:03

    Beautiful! I'd way rather try the royal rhyme though. :)

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  8. Marit30 July 2011 at 13:40

    Such great senryu!!! I'd like to try this form (and also Tanka) sometime... the photo's are beautiful too!

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  9. Anonymous30 July 2011 at 16:30

    haiku & senryu were the first writing i ever did, so they hold a special place in my heart. {though i wish i didn't have haiku in the name of my blog.} i still have to count the syllables on my fingers though {giggle} so that should tell you how far beyond my skill level is any form with "feet" and "meters" and rhyming, for that matter.

    some of the modern poets don't worry if there's an extra syllable {or fewer} if the poem requires a certain word to sound right and it's coming from your heart.

    your senryu are beautiful, Heaven! i like the hint of sensuality in the first and the love that comes through in the second.
    dani ♥

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  10. deb did it30 July 2011 at 16:33

    fluid, lovely and tactfully tactile

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  11. Anonymous31 July 2011 at 11:33

    These are beautiful.

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  12. Anonymous2 August 2011 at 06:34

    Really like these Heaven. I started off counting the syllables and then quickly moved to free form haiku and senryu... // Peter.

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  13. Margaret Pangert2 August 2011 at 16:39

    So sensual, the lovely aftermath of passion, intimate. Welcome to haiku my heart!

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