Saturday, 17 March 2012

Once upon a time





once upon a time
a prince wanted to marry
the poorest girl, yet at the same time, the richest
he found her living at edge of the forest
with her spindle, shuttle and needle


he saw that she can spin straw into gold,
and find the needle pea under mattresses.


so he asked if he can kiss her,
lead her to ride his horse and gallop away towards his castle. 
  
nope.   
she told him to 
get off his horse,
cut down some wood for the fire


and live with her amidst the sky and trees.


they live happily ever after.


~0~0~0~



you gave me a kiss 
when i was sleeping.
did you really kiss me because
i was the fairest one?
or because i was 
                          vulnerable?


Posted for D'verse Poets Pub:   Poetics:  Once Upon a Time hosted by Claudia S.   
Happy St. Patrick's Day to those who celebrate it.  Thanks for the visit.  


Fairy tale story here
picture credit:   here

41 comments:

  1. smiles..i like...i like that he gave up his castle to stay with her in the forest, cutting fire wood...that's a different sort of magic.. those down to earth magic that modern fairy tales are all about...

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    1. Thank you for the lovely words Claudia. I wanted a different kind of ending to this post ~

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  2. oh great question there in the end...and if it was for the fairness then what when it is gone? i think having hte prince live not in oppulence but simplicity is very rich....smiles....

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    1. Thanks for liking the second part of the poem...You got my message correctly ~

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  3. Ahhh.. nice twist in the tale ... on all counts :)

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  4. I like this. If the Prince loves her, let him live in HER setting. Castle life would be pretty mundane anyway, and the clothing one would have to wear really confining.

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    1. I never thought of that Mary ~ Thank you ~

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  5. Vulnerability is such an interesting issue in love. The prince must leave his comfort zone; I like to think they save each other.

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  6. Rapunzalesque princesisms! (now there are two words I don't even think exist ha ha) this has the essence of the fairytale - your twist in the question and the cutting of wood drags it firmly into the modern! Nice!

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  7. ... or perhaps the kiss is because he loves her. Great tales!!

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  8. Castle's are too big and drafty anyway, interesting question you bring about too, could start out as vulnerable, as many a time it does.

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  9. Love the staccato effect in the poem. I'd like to say 'fairest' but I fear vulnerability and opportunity were at play too.

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  10. Beautiful. I love the moral to this one.
    http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2012/03/17/the-wolf-and-the-rose-2/

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  11. I love the twist in these--it seems like two separate fairy tales/poems to me, but of course, that's just me. About time the princess shows she has a brain.

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  12. I love this imagery:

    "she told him to
    get off his horse,
    cut down some wood for the fire
    and live with her amidst the sky and trees"

    And wow, is your ending strong:

    "did you really kiss me because
    i was the fairest one?
    or because i was vulnerable?"

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  13. Heaven, a great fractured poem. Love it. It danced with humour. I especially loved the ending.

    Denise

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  14. I liked the second one (or was it second half?) it had a good feel to me!

    Wander
























    0

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  15. wat a story u weaved !!
    lovely
    and the que at the end left me in deep thinking

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  16. That second piece is outstanding!

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  17. Love the contrast between the realities of real life versus the fantasy of fairy tales in the first poem. Such messages aa those purveyed by the traditional tales may indeed set unrealistic expectations that ultimately make any love based on them superficial and often dysfunxtionally negative for women. The second part of the poem brings this moral into play and acts as a great counterpart to the preceding part. It is important to remain aware of the power of art to either create ideals that support or destroy spiritual growth.

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  18. Yes, I like the twist here too--the Princess gets to call some shots, ask questions for a change! K.

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  19. now that's a fairy tale after my own heart... :) - as for the "afterword" (is how I think of it) - I can only say WOW!! - so deeply insightful.

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  20. Really like how you took subtle parts of existing fairy tales well known and spun them together, interwoven with your own words. Excellent job, really enjoyed the read, especially the ending. Thanks

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  21. what a twist.loved the reversal of the stereotype and the provocative afterword.

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  22. receiving a kiss while I sleep melts my heart into honey

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  23. An excellent little Fairy Tale. I love a woman who knows what she wants.

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  24. Lovely read. A wonderful little fairy tale.

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  25. I love her inviting him to live among the sky and trees......THAT is a happy ending!

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  26. so is this about space (space shuttle, space needle) just kidding...

    nice little fairy tale

    once upon a polar bear

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  27. Loved that ending! And that is certainly an excellent question.

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  28. I love how you sort of mixedmashed a bunch of bits of fairy tales together and created your own magical piece. Great job!

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  29. Stunning, Heaven. I can't add much more than what's been said in the comments. You hit this outta the park with imagination.

    Awesome!

    xo

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  30. This rocks, I love that she made him stay where it was real. Awesome stuff...and the last part, that question, is haunting...

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  31. i love once upon a time poems, like this. :)

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  32. oh yes! i love this!!

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  33. Ohhh that last refrain delightful :)

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  34. Love them both. I think the second edges ahead of the first for me, maybe because of growing regrets. *sigh* Your tales are significantly briefer than mine, but I hope you'll take a peek at the rabbit tale. :)

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