It is I
knocking at your door,
not as a beggar nor
with a question
but someone who has written
the saddest song,
the loneliest poem
diminished,
a fraction of lemon leaf,
bereft of scent and colour
fear has stilled my fingers
wanting to pull you under the water tide,
melting in the roughness,
arching feet in foamy sands
i have come
as one who now cries at every moon rise,
wretched with summer's brevity,
weary of long roads,
weary of long roads,
my hands searches
for your light and steady gait,
even your shadows comfort me
I am knocking
not to leave you again
but to stay
yes, to stay
Inspired by Pablo Neruda's The Question - When I don't know what to write, I turn to reading Neruda's poems. A light piece for this long weekend ~ Back to work on Tuesday~
Posted for OpenLinkNight of Real Toads - Monday
and D'verse Poets Pub - Tuesday
Sounds like they were allowed back too, from the looks of it at least haha. Don't know what we have until it's gone sometimes.
ReplyDeleteThanks Pat ~ I hope you enjoyed the long weekend ~
DeleteThis is beautiful, Grace. I love the soft and gentle messsage. I am glad that THIS time she'll stay.
ReplyDeleteThank you Mary for the lovely words and visit ~ I appreciate it ~
Deletesmiles...lovely....staying is a wonderful thing...i rather like neruda as well...def feel the emotions as i read it...
ReplyDeleteThank you Brian, though I must admit that the seasons changing slightly influenced my words ~
DeleteSorry about the delete, Grace, I called you out of your name.
ReplyDeleteAnd I find this such a difficult poem. So much explaining and holding back just to win a shadow? There are leaves to jump in and bulbs to plant, and parties to plan and a night to dance. But you are probably writing a country song here and I am in a jazz mood. I hope I made you laugh at least, by chasing the blues away. Sleep well! Tomorrow is another day.
Neruda has always this way of writing, but I never thought of this as a country song. Different readers, different perspectives. Thanks for the visit Susan ~
DeleteNice poem, Heaven, it tugs at my heart. Do I let her in hoping she will stay or look the other way?
ReplyDeleteBTW, I always say "It is me" although grammarically incorrect, 90% follow my way. Ms. 'Grammar Girl' says that is fine and that I am forgiven, even by most of her peers. http://grammar.quickanddirtytips.com/grammar-linking-verbs.aspx
..
I like to stick to formal writing but its also fine to say "it is me" ~ Thanks for the visit Jim ~
DeleteThis is breathtaking and I don't feel it as a light piece. I feel the weight of strong feelings here.
ReplyDeleteI meant light as to the topic as its not dealing with life or death or anything political. Thank you Anne ~ I appreciate your visit ~
DeleteSo beautiful...I too read Pablo when I am without words.
ReplyDeleteThank you Susie ~
DeleteHave never read Pablo Neruda... I will check him out now.
ReplyDeleteVery intense poem... he looks happy to have her back.
Do check him out Margaret ~
DeleteThank you for the visit and support ~
Ahh 2nd stanza won me :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Aidz ~
Deletehope he lets her stay! Very intense, HEaven!
ReplyDeletewah! too gud!
ReplyDeleteI feel like I just went through this myself. This is beautiful, Heaven, you always touch my heart. Thank you for sharing your writing.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad she'll chose to stay too. Love has to constantly e worked at or else, like anything else, it dies.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful Grace.
Yes, we had a great long weekend. Hope you did too. :)
weary of long roads..knocking at that door...to stay...deciding to stay is a good thing..
ReplyDeleteGrace, I am loving this--the lemon leaf, the crying at moonrise. Perfect.
ReplyDeletethis is so.......moving *sigh*
ReplyDeleteThis tugs at the heart, at how difficult it is to stay and how difficult it is to love over the long term--just a gorgeous write Grace--
ReplyDeleteI've not read a lot of Neruda, but this resonates so well with what I have. If you'd not owned up to him as the inspiration for this, I would have said that it was Neruda-like :-)
ReplyDeleteLovely writing. I especially love this stanza:
ReplyDeletediminished,
a fraction of lemon leaf,
bereft of scent and colour
And I was just thinking this morning that it's been far too long since I last read Neruda. Thanks for the push over the edge. I'll have to go to the library tonight I guess.
It feels uncomfortable, honest, and humbling... and nicely turned from traditional expressions... I like
ReplyDeleteThis was really a joy to read, grace. I fell in love with her early on. She seemed a hunger to be shared as feast.
ReplyDeleteRick
Grace, this is beautiful. I love it!
ReplyDeleteI really liked this piece, well written
ReplyDeleteWell, written answer. Like the yearning in your words. well done.
ReplyDeleteThis is so beautiful...... I loved it! :D
ReplyDeleteabsence makes the heart grow fonder.... I don't know who said that, but it's so true. And the opposite is..... so ... opposite! I mean we need that break every once in a while, we have to break that routine, that same-ole same-ole..... Get out, take a walk on the beach, come back later and knock on the door again.... Or in my world take separate vacations! LOL! It does a world of wonders... But in the very least you just captured life in it's raw essence here, dear Heaven... good poetry!
ReplyDeleteThis is a sad song indeed, being a hopeless romantic and someone who has a hard time letting go (damn those interminable voices) this hits a nerve for me. Sometimes wish I was the strong and independent one, but the harder I try, the worse I get. I guess I am who I am....maybe its time to embrace that. great job grace...wonderful writing.
ReplyDeleteSo endearing, love the ending.
ReplyDelete"a fraction of lemon leaf"
ReplyDeleteand also
"arching feet in foamy sands"
are both such satisfying sentences...if that makes sense.
I love this, Grace. I'm pretty fond of Neruda also, he has such a subtle way of shoveling out emotion. Love the ending and the longing in the comfort of a shadow.
ReplyDeleteWow! this was phenomenal Grace--loved that"fraction of a lemon leaf" and the ending--really fine writing :-)
ReplyDeleteOne icon on my desktop is a link to writings of Neruda.
ReplyDelete...and this, your writing is of countless numbers of peeps.
Our decisions--some poor ones--live with us forever.
We can begin anew, very day is a new one. Knock, knock!
PEACE, Grace!
Steve E
inspiring this is. there is something so courageous about staying.
ReplyDeleteGood for her! Stay on! There are lots to share. Nicely Heaven!
ReplyDeleteHank
This is beautiful & written in the spirit of a Neruda Poem...evocative & lovely :)
ReplyDeleteGrace,
ReplyDeleteLoved the wonderful music and rhythm of this...the metaphor of the lemon is exquisite, and the ending held such finality. Excellent piece.
Has the wonderful urgency and painful feeling of reconciliation. K.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful story tinged with a hint of sadness ~ I could feel the loss so desperate to be reprieved
ReplyDeleteI know Pablo Neruda influences some of what you write. But that's because you already have a poet's soul, and your love poems connect with something familiar in all our hearts.
ReplyDeleteI really like this one. It is full of feeling.
I enjoy Neruda and am happy to read how he inspires your work. Awesome!
ReplyDeleteAll the words have been said, I can only repeat that this is a very special poem. Of all the lines, this one resonates the most with me "even your shadows comfort me"
ReplyDeleteStaying is goood...
ReplyDeleteAnna :o]
Lovely, Heaven! So many beautiful words and I feel the wonderful sinking feeling of surrender :-) Thank you!!
ReplyDelete-Eva
"i have come as one who cries at every moonrise" when I read this line, I thought immediately of Neruda, A deeply inspiring poet. This is a beautiful poem
ReplyDeleteI'd have to say this is one of my favorite of yours...and I love Neruda's poetry as well.
ReplyDeleteSensuality!
ReplyDeleteI feel the influence of Neruda in this...just exquisite!
ReplyDelete