Thursday, 24 October 2013

Rondeau: An Evergreen

         Parijata, Sorrowful Tree


Will you come with me, where the nights
linger long, steeped flowering white
      blooms, aromatic as primrose
      red & full.   The moon will stand close
            cradling our words, silver & light -


Come & take my hands, oiled, stained bright
of saffron.   They're yours to hold tight      
       when all else fails you, I propose -
            Come with me


Be my first love & second sight
I'll bear sun's ire if we take flight    
     This forest, we'll garden a house             
     evergreen, lush of poems & prose    
With sky as sole witness, tonight
            Come with me



Posted for:   Imaginary Garden with Real Toads - Language of Flowers
& D'verse Poets Pub - Rondeau Form - that's fifteen line poems using only 2 rhymes, set out in three stanzas of 5, 4, and 6 lines respectively, with a refrain that forms the opening of the first line and the last line of stanzas two and three. The rhyme scheme is Refrain-a, a, b, b, a -          a, a , b, Refrain -        a, a, b, b, a, Refrain.
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45 comments:

  1. brudberg24 October 2013 at 07:21

    How wonderful and lustful... just maybe my rondeau could be the male answer *smiles* I had not even read your entry before.. :-) ha.. this is going to be fun...

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    1. Scarlet24 October 2013 at 08:38

      I just read it, smiles ~ Fun & challenging to do, thanks ~

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  2. Brian Miller24 October 2013 at 08:16

    be my first love and second sight....smiles...i really like that line...how could someone say no to your offer as well...smiles...the sky being the sole witness is a great line as well....

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  3. humbird24 October 2013 at 08:29

    'Come with me' - very effective as a refrain ...nice seductive invite :)

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  4. DEZMOND24 October 2013 at 08:29

    where my nights linger long....

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  5. Vandana Sharma24 October 2013 at 09:04

    What a breath taking piece, just so romantic. Reading it again and again;)

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  6. Kerry O'Connor24 October 2013 at 09:42

    Be my first love & second sight
    I'll bear sun's ire if we take flight ...

    This is incredibly beautiful, Grace. Your use of form took the poem to another level.

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    1. Scarlet24 October 2013 at 11:57

      Thank you for the challenge & lovely post on Language of Flowers Kerry ~

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  7. Mary24 October 2013 at 09:52

    Lovely rondeau, Grace. Gentle and loving!

    " The moon will stand close
    cradling our words, silver & light "

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  8. Grandmother Mary24 October 2013 at 10:54

    Such a gorgeous invitation- be my first love and second sight. Lovely images throughout.

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  9. Ella24 October 2013 at 12:16

    I too love your form and the magic that develops~
    Romance blooms in your garden, tender n' sweet!

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  10. Marian24 October 2013 at 12:21

    first love & second sight
    wonderful! i love the rondeau form. love it.

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  11. Anonymous24 October 2013 at 12:46

    musical and sensuous and inviting :) ~

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  12. Anonymous24 October 2013 at 13:02

    How could a man resist an invitation like that? This is a beautiful rondeau - and is completely in tune with its origins as a romantic lyric poem. Brave, Grace - you made it look easy.

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous24 October 2013 at 13:03

      That should say Bravo - not brave... smiles

      Delete
  13. Anonymous24 October 2013 at 13:45

    "Will you come with me, where the nights
    linger long, steeped flowering white
    blooms, aromatic as primrose
    red & full. The moon will stand close
    cradling our words, silver & light -"
    Lovely words which set the tone for your lush poem. Beautiful.

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  14. Sherry Blue Sky24 October 2013 at 14:09

    What a WONDERFUL rondeau! Loved every line, Grace!

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  15. Glenn Buttkus24 October 2013 at 15:12

    You & Bjorn are classic forms bookends on this one; you rocked the form, and certainly did make it appear effortless (though we all suspect you worked hard on it). Old maverick me, I chose the English Rondeau, and it worked fine for my understanding of the form. FFA prompts rule, and you seem to be one of the rulers.

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  16. Kay L. Davies24 October 2013 at 15:34

    I hardly know what to add here, Grace. The others have said everything already. But this is truly romantic and delightful. I love the idea of the moon standing close to cradle your words.
    K

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  17. Anonymous24 October 2013 at 15:35

    Very beautiful!

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  18. Margaret24 October 2013 at 15:36

    How to pass on such sweet temptation! This rondeau is smooth as silk and you make a challenging form look so easy. I won't copy and paste as all three stanzas would be reposted :)

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  19. hyperCRYPTICal24 October 2013 at 15:49

    Truly beautiful Grace, quite luscious.
    Anna :o]

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  20. Susie Clevenger24 October 2013 at 15:57

    Lovely grace. "we'll garden a house" Love that!

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  21. Anonymous24 October 2013 at 16:06

    Ah lovely, Grace. Very well done. k.

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  22. Pat Hatt24 October 2013 at 19:26

    The sky sees all and such things are grand at every hall

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  23. Jeff24 October 2013 at 20:39

    Beautiful--that word "lush" fits so well. A real treat for the senses!

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  24. Mystic_Mom24 October 2013 at 22:49

    Very sensual...love the hands!

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  25. Unknown25 October 2013 at 00:14

    Grace, this rondeau is really quiet an invitation - lovely.

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  26. Anonymous25 October 2013 at 00:52

    A lot of wonderful passion in this piece!

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  27. Outcast25 October 2013 at 07:18

    Incredible, I'm filled with so much sensuality right now it's crazy.

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  28. Kathryn Dyche25 October 2013 at 08:29

    Both sensual and seductive, beautiful Grace.

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  29. Anonymous25 October 2013 at 09:29

    Be my first love & second sight
    A beautiful line in a romantic offering which I thoroughly enjoyed... :)

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  30. Kathy Reed25 October 2013 at 11:50

    I'm struck by the title because out of the proposed one night comes something everlasting...love that idea and the saffron stained hands as well ;)

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  31. TCPC25 October 2013 at 13:56

    Awww! romantically sweet and sweetly romantic!

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  32. Unknown25 October 2013 at 14:49

    The manner with which you stimulate all the senses is particularly impressive in this vivid piece. Lovely.

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  33. ayala25 October 2013 at 14:57

    Gorgeous poem! I love it :)

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  34. Susan25 October 2013 at 17:20

    Seductive and plaintive too--"first love and second sight." Sigh. Yes, Yes. How could no be the answer?

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  35. Rosemary Nissen-Wade25 October 2013 at 21:56

    Gorgeous - as ever!

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  36. Anonymous25 October 2013 at 23:47

    So romantic, Grace. :-)

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  37. Anonymous26 October 2013 at 11:42

    Totally beautifully done! I am in awe.

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Thanks for your visit and comments ~ I appreciate them ~

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