Thursday, 24 October 2013

Rondeau: An Evergreen

         Parijata, Sorrowful Tree


Will you come with me, where the nights
linger long, steeped flowering white
      blooms, aromatic as primrose
      red & full.   The moon will stand close
            cradling our words, silver & light -


Come & take my hands, oiled, stained bright
of saffron.   They're yours to hold tight      
       when all else fails you, I propose -
            Come with me


Be my first love & second sight
I'll bear sun's ire if we take flight    
     This forest, we'll garden a house             
     evergreen, lush of poems & prose    
With sky as sole witness, tonight
            Come with me




Posted for:   Imaginary Garden with Real Toads - Language of Flowers
& D'verse Poets Pub - Rondeau Form - that's fifteen line poems using only 2 rhymes, set out in three stanzas of 5, 4, and 6 lines respectively, with a refrain that forms the opening of the first line and the last line of stanzas two and three. The rhyme scheme is Refrain-a, a, b, b, a -          a, a , b, Refrain -        a, a, b, b, a, Refrain.

46 comments:

  1. How wonderful and lustful... just maybe my rondeau could be the male answer *smiles* I had not even read your entry before.. :-) ha.. this is going to be fun...

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    1. I just read it, smiles ~ Fun & challenging to do, thanks ~

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  2. be my first love and second sight....smiles...i really like that line...how could someone say no to your offer as well...smiles...the sky being the sole witness is a great line as well....

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  3. 'Come with me' - very effective as a refrain ...nice seductive invite :)

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  4. where my nights linger long....

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    1. Do they, smiles ~ Thanks Dezzy ~

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  5. What a breath taking piece, just so romantic. Reading it again and again;)

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  6. Be my first love & second sight
    I'll bear sun's ire if we take flight ...

    This is incredibly beautiful, Grace. Your use of form took the poem to another level.

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    1. Thank you for the challenge & lovely post on Language of Flowers Kerry ~

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  7. Lovely rondeau, Grace. Gentle and loving!

    " The moon will stand close
    cradling our words, silver & light "

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  8. Such a gorgeous invitation- be my first love and second sight. Lovely images throughout.

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  9. I too love your form and the magic that develops~
    Romance blooms in your garden, tender n' sweet!

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  10. first love & second sight
    wonderful! i love the rondeau form. love it.

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  11. musical and sensuous and inviting :) ~

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  12. How could a man resist an invitation like that? This is a beautiful rondeau - and is completely in tune with its origins as a romantic lyric poem. Brave, Grace - you made it look easy.

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    1. That should say Bravo - not brave... smiles

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  13. "Will you come with me, where the nights
    linger long, steeped flowering white
    blooms, aromatic as primrose
    red & full. The moon will stand close
    cradling our words, silver & light -"
    Lovely words which set the tone for your lush poem. Beautiful.

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  14. What a WONDERFUL rondeau! Loved every line, Grace!

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  15. You & Bjorn are classic forms bookends on this one; you rocked the form, and certainly did make it appear effortless (though we all suspect you worked hard on it). Old maverick me, I chose the English Rondeau, and it worked fine for my understanding of the form. FFA prompts rule, and you seem to be one of the rulers.

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  16. I hardly know what to add here, Grace. The others have said everything already. But this is truly romantic and delightful. I love the idea of the moon standing close to cradle your words.
    K

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  17. How to pass on such sweet temptation! This rondeau is smooth as silk and you make a challenging form look so easy. I won't copy and paste as all three stanzas would be reposted :)

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  18. Truly beautiful Grace, quite luscious.
    Anna :o]

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  19. Lovely grace. "we'll garden a house" Love that!

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  20. Ah lovely, Grace. Very well done. k.

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  21. The sky sees all and such things are grand at every hall

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  22. Beautiful--that word "lush" fits so well. A real treat for the senses!

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  23. Very sensual...love the hands!

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  24. Grace, this rondeau is really quiet an invitation - lovely.

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  25. A lot of wonderful passion in this piece!

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  26. Incredible, I'm filled with so much sensuality right now it's crazy.

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  27. Both sensual and seductive, beautiful Grace.

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  28. Be my first love & second sight
    A beautiful line in a romantic offering which I thoroughly enjoyed... :)

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  29. I'm struck by the title because out of the proposed one night comes something everlasting...love that idea and the saffron stained hands as well ;)

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  30. Awww! romantically sweet and sweetly romantic!

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  31. The manner with which you stimulate all the senses is particularly impressive in this vivid piece. Lovely.

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  32. Gorgeous poem! I love it :)

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  33. Seductive and plaintive too--"first love and second sight." Sigh. Yes, Yes. How could no be the answer?

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  34. Totally beautifully done! I am in awe.

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Thanks for your visit and comments ~ I appreciate them ~