Thursday 11 April 2013

On the first day of spring



i kiss you  
on the first day of spring-
as buds unfurl its mighty colors-
as leaves carelessly fling their hats in the wind-
         seizing the joy
         of this moment-
         the riot of bees frolicking -
         the bursting of green, dapper & bold
                -in the garden-   
         bold & dapper, this newness burst, 
         -frolicking, like bees in a riot-
         momentous, is this
         joy. seizing
hats, winded, we fling them carelessly.   leaves, 
of colors mightily unfurl,  like buds
in spring- that day, the first time
you kissed me-



Posted for D'verse Poets Pub - Poetry Form:  Palindrome - Not perfect as the mirror poem but fun to do ~  Thanks Gayle ~   

46 comments:

  1. Adore this Heaven. Really makes me wish I had a lover to smack a Springtime kiss on, love it.

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  2. So close to perfect palindrome, and outstanding poetics, Grace. This challenge required a lot of work, and our solutions vary like wildflowers on foothills; yours was gorgeous.

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    1. Thank you Glenn ~ This was most fun to do ~

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  3. ooo. rewind, do it again. love it.

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  4. I like how you've made this your own, and going from person to person with the kiss is wonderful, Grace.

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  5. I saw another palindrome poem today as well (Brian over at Way Station One) - wow you all are so talented.

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    1. Thank you Keith ~ Well we responded to the same prompt over at D'verse ~

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  6. haha...love how you did this grace...lol...you did make it your own but kept the spirit of it as well...i may need to retry and paly around a bit more creatively as you did....nice on putting the one section in the middle as well to break up the rewind of the first...i like this much...

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    1. Thank you Brian ~ I think I will write another one too ~

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  7. Not a perfect palindrome - but by making minor alterations to the form's demands you have produced a beautiful poem, Grace.

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    1. I like making alterations in the form ~ Thank you Tony ~

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  8. This is so bold in its feeling of joy, Grace. Love what you did with the palindrome. No, they're not easy but are fun to play around with. Thank you for joining in.
    Gayle ~

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    1. Thank you for the wonderful challenge Gayle ~

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  9. nice...beautiful capture of the atmosphere of this first kiss and cool job on the form as well heaven

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    1. Upside down, inside out and back to front.
      You gave us everywhich way here.

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  10. Ah, love and spring. The perfect subjects for such a damning prompt, don't you think? This was very pleasurable to read, regardless of how true to being a palindrome it is.

    Thank you.

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    1. I think the form should not dominate nor restrict the poem ~ The writer should have the leeway to make the message more powerful~ Thank you ~

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  11. The reversal acted to reinforce the zest of spring, and that first kiss is delightful! (One small question did you intentionally choose "its" over "their" in the third line?)

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  12. Nothing like the awakening of spring, and passion, and romance. Captured it beautifully.

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  13. Now that is sure more than a spring fling haha spring and love, sure can make one float lie a dove, unless it snows again, blah

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  14. Playful--romantic--loved it!

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  15. mmm...spring.... we just experienced a beautiful week, though today it turned, still....

    I like how you worked this piece. I can see the essence of the palindrome even if it doesn't match word for word or line for line. beautifully written.

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  16. Oh, the heck with perfection, this is GORGEOUS.

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  17. I always feel absolutely sublime and playful every time I drop by here. Now, where is that gorgeous husband of mine....

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  18. I love the way you worked that.

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  19. absolutely beautiful, the words and feelings you evoke.

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  20. Always very romantic, because something as ordinary as kissing can become very special to you.

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  21. oh wonderful...the little twist of a few verses, irrespective of falling in line with the form, added a beauty to the feelings underneath the verses!!

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  22. You and Gayle both used those bees to win!
    Fun style

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  23. Ah, very clever take on this - feels like a modern, fresh view of palindromes.

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  24. your poem definitely made the event special... great play with words

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  25. This is lovely!

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  26. This is beautiful, not to mention you skill in writing this difficult form. Congrats.

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  27. This is really lovely, and so well done with the form.

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  28. Oh what passion you have gifted the first day of spring - lovely!

    Anna :o]

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  29. Oh the wonder of that first kiss,,,I love the excitement in your poem,,,the thrill of it all,,,, :-)

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  30. Your talent never ceases to amaze, Grace. Such a beautiful poem in an amazing form. As always, thank you!

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  31. Joy of the kiss...when it feels right...Heaven-ly!:)

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Thanks for your visit and comments ~ I appreciate them ~