Monday 15 February 2016

The tainted gift


After a few sips of red wine, you went for a tentative kiss on my lips.   It was tender, soft, smell of fresh ink on brand new page.   I twined my arms around your neck, and pressed for another kiss.   No words were enough, and I was swept into your fiery embrace.   There were no secrets I kept from you as I was an open book.   Soon, you proposed with a diamond ring under the moonless night.   I was thrilled by your passionate declarations, and marked this day, the day.   

Under your persuasion, I threw out caution, and we went on road trips together. It was wild rebellion, goose-bumps intense like "us versus the world".  The tides quickly turned deep & blood-thirsty.  You became the enabler, that I was trying out things I have not done before - marathon drinks & drug-induced parties until the morning.   The final sting came one midnight, when I had to be rushed to the hospital due to severe attacks from heady drug cocktails.   What was in the shadows that nursed your shaking heart?  Or was the darkness already in me, awaiting your touch ?

icy polar wind  
snaps the twigs to white, deadly
still, color of my sky




Inspired by:  "Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift." 
― Mary Oliver


Posted for D'verse Poets Pub - Haibun Monday - Join us when the pub opens at 3pm EST.

29 comments:

  1. This is splendid Grace.. love the narrative, and the lessons learned from the darkness handed. So much passion, and so many roads it might lead to.. and that darkness awaiting to be raised... The haiku is a splendid crown.. the deadly / still linebreak... wow.

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    1. Thanks Bjorn ~ It is also very chilly right now & the sky is all white ~

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  2. Such a difficult gift of darkness. Chilling beauty and raw emotion.

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  3. I used that same gift of darkness with my haibun, Grace. You ask a good question with your last line. Some people are just waiting for the opportunity to present itself.

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    1. I believe we all have that darkness inside; it's a matter of willing it to bloom or fade away ~ Thanks Gayle ~

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  4. Many of us I think like and identify with this quote. I can certainly identify with the crazy drug time. However, you wrote this with both sadness and truth and it doesn't sound like bravado - it sounds like recognition of that gift of darkness and the true lesson learned. The haiku is heartbreaking. Oh how it speaks to me! I think my answer to your final question is...a little of both. After years of opening that gift and then closing it, it truly is both in retrospect.

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    1. I agree, a little of both ~ There is an aspect of darkness inside us, and when we have learned our lesson, we would know how to deal with it ~ On hindsight, learning the gift of darkness makes us appreciate the light & all its beauty ~ Thanks Toni ~

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  5. Can sure take its toll and the darkness will try and win in the end, teaching as it tries.

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  6. Sometimes what seems like a good gift shows its true colors as time goes on. But luckily sometimes lessons learned from the darkness are the BEST gifts of all! Thanks for the good prompt today, Grace.

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  7. Some are mighty good at persuasion, and the effects last for a long time, or always

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  8. We all have our darkness, we just need a catalyst....

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  9. Or was the darkness already in me, awaiting your touch... nice twist there.

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  10. "color of my sky" -- there is so much sting in this, and yet a glimmer of hope.

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  11. Trying to comment again: I particularly loved that sentiment that whatever is in us, good or bad, can be 'enabled' by a certain person. Or was the darkness already in me, awaiting your touch ? Eerie, dark and accurately, sensitively observed.

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  12. There's an odd balance in darkness. We don't often see it until we're standing in light again.

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  13. These perpetrators do enable the darkest parts of us but they were already there. Your description of this is amazing!

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  14. I think we all have darkness waiting within. This was enthralling to read.

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  15. Wonderful! I will learn more about Haibun writing as I practice more. :-)
    ZQ

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  16. The questions at the end are hear trending. And the line break in the haiku is stellar.

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  17. "It was tender, soft, smell of fresh ink on brand new page." A unique association which says so much about a new relationship. I, too, like the questions at the end, and the break in your haiku.

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  18. And worse of all the ones who never learn and never leave the darkness. Made me think of someone I once knew.

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  19. Well-written, Grace. I like the question at the end of your prose especially.

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  20. Very powerful and confronting Grace....loved the journey your took me on...

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  21. This was hard to read. I knew someone, once a long time ago, who met here enabler, but she never made her way back.

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  22. madness in your blood,
    you know its me,
    - you know what i want

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  23. For me at least..
    a Female Captain
    of a Military
    station.. she.. my
    boss.. loaded me
    down with more
    and more work..
    broke me
    down..
    in a two
    year span..
    finAlly
    for 5 years
    almost dead..
    and now i am
    Free.. a big wet
    kiss is coming her
    way if i ever see
    that sea
    witch
    of dArk
    to liGhTest
    bliss aGain..;)

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  24. Oops.. forgot the
    Fredku..;)

    Sea Witch then
    no problems
    now..:)

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