Love is a war of lightning,
and two bodies ruined by a single sweetness.
-Pablo Neruda
the slow trickle of heat, love
is enough to flame the forest, it is
season for hunger - smell of rosebuds, a
wave of spring green- a war-
drum beats, our chests throbbing of
passion- your kisses are lightning
while my lips are ink and
pink pressing letters on your skin, we're two
voyagers finding the same spiral shell, our bodies
are petals of clover, ruined
by blazing afternoon sun, by
wild tempest of colors, a
language our fingers (re)trace, trembling under a single
symphony- this season is sweetness
Posted for D'verse OpenLink Night, hosted by Gayle
Poem form is Golden Shovel - where the end word of each line is a quote from one of Pablo Neruda's poem. Thanks De for the introduction of this form~
this is so vivid and full of vibrant existence and emotion. beautiful.
ReplyDeleteThis felt like reading a Neruda Poem.. the voice is perfect expansion of the chosen lines. I think this might be one of my favorite of yours in a long time.
ReplyDeleteSweet without being saccharine, this lusty piece is terrific; not only a perfect Neruda golden shovel, but you felt frisky with the lines, letting them move around a bit, & the parentheses pop up as well; what fun. I love the lines /your kisses are lightning/while my lips are ink/--stunning imagery.
ReplyDeleteSuch sweet and sensuous array of emotions flow from this poem :D
ReplyDeleteBeautifully penned.
Lots of love,
Sanaa
I'll echo what Glenn said, as you have us, transverse salts, in an afterwards, lingering in the strewn fine sugared spill of your poem ... :)
ReplyDeleteI love the inking lips of pink "pressing letters on your skin"...a passionate Golden Shovel, Grace.
ReplyDeleteSimply lovely. This is such a fun form and you've done a great job with it here.
ReplyDeletePassionate without being too fulsome. I like the way your lines have expanded on the quote from Neruda and given them a new life.
ReplyDeleteThis phrase is splendid: "your kisses are lightning while my lips are ink" -- Really lovely poem
ReplyDeleteMy favorite lines by you:
ReplyDeleteyour kisses are lightning
while my lips are ink and
pink pressing letters on your skin, we're two
voyagers finding the same spiral shell,
Superb! and creatively visual. You always capture my attention towards your writing. I love this so much. :)
I really like this form I may have to try it sometimes. The poem flows effortlessly, you are a weaver of words.
ReplyDeleteGrace, this is delicious. I love that I can feel the Neruda, but the poem is still all yours. Such effective enjambment and dance of words. Love how the image coil and sway, in unison... showing us everything. ♥
ReplyDeleteIf I wanted to read something that says spring this would be it Grace, truly beautiful images you have created.
ReplyDeleteHEAVENS.
ReplyDeleteThis is fantastic.
First off, the line you chose is breathtaking. Your use of it, divine.
Oh, THIS:
"while my lips are ink and
pink pressing letters on your skin"
And your use of spacing, parens, hyphens. Goodness. I am simply in love with this poem.
Such an achievement - form, words, emotions - everything.
ReplyDeletelovely!!
ReplyDelete...finding the same spiral shell... Oh this is wonderful indeed. The passion is visceral! I believe I must fan myself!!
ReplyDeleteJust an excellent expansion of Neruda's line!
Quite a season one would never want to end
ReplyDeleteFearless!
ReplyDeleteAh, the passion, the vibrancy, the shear fierceness of love. You captured this so well!
ReplyDeleteSounds like spring, sounds like a fever *grin*
ReplyDeleteOh, yes! You've mastered the golden shovel -- gorgeous piece, very sensual!
ReplyDeleteOh my, this is wickedly hot. I especially loved the wordplay here:
ReplyDeleteyour kisses are lightning
while my lips are ink and
pink pressing letters on your skin, we're two
voyagers finding the same spiral shell,
Wow... it is warm in here... need a glass of water...
Oh my..this is so sensual and sweet. I would end up quoting the whole piece to choose a favourite line. I love Pablo Neruda's work and you have woven it in so well that the Golden Shovel effect is seamless. Love this.
ReplyDeleteA very sexy write Grace! Hot and electrifying. Hugs!
ReplyDeleteFiery!!! :-) You do know how to write with the senses.
ReplyDelete~Imelda